|...AND A BIG HELPING OF HELL..|
I've been quite unwell recently, but I still feel obliged to drag my furry carcass over to the keyboard and warn any unsuspecting romantic comedy fans about this travesty of a movie. Even if I only save one of you - it'll be worth it. My TV Guide described this drivel as "a touching romcom", so I sat back and prepared myself to be "touched". I envisioned a light-hearted, love conquers all, mildly amusing, slush-fest. Well, that'll teach me to be optimistic about ANY movie starring the emotional wasteland and talentless void, that is Kate Hudson.
In a rancid nut-shell, it was about a committment-phobic young woman called Marley (this name alone, irritated the Hell out of me) with a terminal illness, falling in love with her doctor and facing her impending demise with hilarious one liners and lip quivering bravery.
She is carefree, works in advertising and has loads of friends and a cute dog. Of course. She may resemble a kangaroo with hair but everybody ADORES her. And why not, she is
|DID YOU STEAL MY LIP-GLOSS, BITCH?|
Marley's best friend and neighbour was Hip, Gay and Black. I think they could have at least also made him a paraplegic to wring more pathos and tears from the situation! He was such a great best friend, because although Marley was dying his main concern for her was her lack of a sex life! So, one evening he ordered a male escort for her. A dwarf male prostitute, whose nickname was "A little bit of Heaven". This was just so heartwarming, I'm tearing up again! I hope when the time comes, we'll all have friends like that - and that there are enough prostitute dwarfs to go around.
If this wasn't enough, we also had her 'not stereotypical at all' bickering, divorced parents, other irritating, dull friends and lots of poignant shots of her shlumping around in an old cardigan. Even the dog was running out of patience by now. You could see it thinking "Is this bitch ever going to die?" (OK, that was ME thinking that.)
Finally, FINALLY the
|MY LITTLE BIT OF HEAVEN!|